Tuesday, 6 January 2009

Day 515 of Captivity

I have not been very well over the Christmas period, it is all the Infidels fault for leaving such niceties lying about just asking to be consumed.  As a result the evil Infidels decided to starve the kelb and I for 24 hours.  To pay them back for their callousness, I woke them in the early hours of the morning gagging, having nothing to sustain me, but my hatred of the Infidels.  It was my 2nd birthday that morning as well!

I was fed a meagre meal of gruel of raw chicken after suffering at the hands of the diabolical Infidels, hardly recompense!  I stored their monstrous behaviour to use against them later.  The opportunity arose to retaliate this evening and I regurgitated my ghastly meal of chicken onto their much prized Indian carpet.  The fun then began as the female Infidel attempted to wrestle the big fat kelb to the ground before he banqueted on my leavings.  I decided to fight the kelb just to add even more amusement to the situation.  The female was not amused and exploded into a fit of apoplexy.  The kelb astutely made his exit and let the female clean up what was left.  I was sent to the solitary confinement of my crate.

Not satisfied with my counterattack on the Infidels, I waited until they were engrossed in the television and took my opportunity for some further skullduggery.  While I was left in solitary the Infidels had dined on some nice smelling homemade herby chicken nuggets.  I thought the oil they were cooked in smelt rather good so managed a good 5 minutes drinking it.  The female Infidel was absolutely horrified when she walked in on me!  It appears that the last laugh is on me though, I am now confined to the couch with the most frightful bellyache and they don't even care that I am crying!  The male Infidel even said that it was my own fault!  Perhaps I will turn the tables and wake them at dawn with some serious wretching, see who is laughing then! 

1 comment:

Tiffani said...

Yo Stella!
Sorry I haven't been around lately to leave you comments, but Mommy and Daddy took me to the mountains last week after a hectic Christmas holiday and it was soooo busy. I'll update my blog soon about it. Glad to hear you're still keeping the kelb and the infidels on their toes. At least you scored for some chocolate (I never get any :( They tell me it's bad for me, but i think they're just lying).

Leans n licks,