In an attempt to alleviate my boredom I went on a recce for food, as I was close to starvation given that the miserly infidels did not share their dinner with me just for a change. It smelt so nice as well and I gave them my best "wasting away" stare too! I really don't know how they managed to resist, they are so insensitive.
The female infidel made some shortbread this morning, that took my fancy. It was on the kitchen counter under a huge plastic dome. I was so annoyed, I had just managed to get the dome off and removed a large slice for myself. As I was about to clamp my jaws shut around my ill-gotten gains that infuriating cretin of a male infidel caught me in the act and swiped my contraband. I was crushed. He then banished me to my cell, berating me all the way. I am waiting to be released for a second attempt, as I think I would have quite enjoyed eating that! Damn infidels!