This afternoon I dragged out the battered remains of the TV control that was stupidly abandoned in between the cushions of the couch. I was just about to disassemble it to finally discover what is inside when the female infidel discovered me and put an end to that plan. I was so miffed, I ate her tour guide of Istanbul with gay abandon, while she went to the lavatory. Ha! That will put an end to any plot she might be hatching to swan off and enjoy herself! Find the Blue Mosque now with half a map, not that they would let you in anyway you stinky infidel!