Once in the car it took me all my strength to summon up a feeble amount of bile, as the evil shrew, fearing the worst on the car journey, starved me today. I had to almost turn myself inside out to vomit on her, but I managed enough to make her gag. Twice on the way there and twice on the way home, the male infidel was driving like the Stig over the most bumpy bits of road he could possibly find.
Once at the offices of the nefarious creature they call the Vet, I was completely terrified. Last time they took me I was sawn in half! Everyone in the waiting room of course thought I was extremely beautiful and cooed and sighed over me, but I gave them all my most piercing stare to make sure they kept away. A kelb was brought in and I gave the cheeky young upstart my most withering stare. He was unable to meet my gaze and rushed passed me to get into the room with the Vet! Little did he know I just found him distasteful, Sweeny Todd the Vet was going to steal his testicles! Kelbs are so vapid.
I was brutally stabbed twice by the Vet in the neck. He also manhandled my ears which made me very unhappy. If I was not so worried that Sweeny Todd would chop me up, I would have surely bitten him. The infidels seemed quite happy to let this evildoer manhandle me as much as he liked, as they twittered on about my diet or lack thereof! I only weighed a pitiful 17.5 KGs, as the witch has starved me to the brink of death!
When I returned home again, the kelb was so thrilled to see me he drooled on me! 9 out of 10 voices in my head told me to kill him, the other just kept humming the melody of Tetris!
I have been forced to scout the kitchen for the remains of the infidel's meal in the dishes which were left soaking in the kitchen sink (she must have burnt the dinner again). It tasted of soap and was not very filling! How they have managed to get so fat on what they eat, I shall never know, most of their food is disgusting and tastes like feet or perhaps it is just her cooking!