Thursday, 8 December 2011

Day 65 in Exile

Oh my stars, todays walk was so funny!  It is wild out there today, rain and high winds.  The shrew decided that she would walk us anyway, so we went through the ritual of bundling up and heading out.  Everything was going well until the kelb (yes I know you are shocked but I seriously was not enjoying the weather this morning) saw a rabbit on the beach.  The old bat must have seen it first, because she had already cunningly secured him to his lead.

After seeing the rabbit the female infidel decided we would get off the beach and head into the hills.  Well the boneheaded buffoon went into some kind of rampage, which resulted in the female having to attach him across her body so that she had her full weight (quite a considerable weight I can tell you) behind him as he dragged us most unceremoniously through the dunes, nose to the ground while the wind whipped around us.  The shrew bellowed like a cow in labour as she stumbled through the hills red faced and looking rather harrassed.

She obviously tired of this and turned back towards the beach.  Just as we reached the top of a dune I could see the cogs turning in her tiny mind and she decided it was far safer to let the kelb make his own way down the bank than to be dragged there by his beefy carcass.  She released him and he turned back to the hills teaming with rabbit warrens.  Most displeased and half way down the bank the female yelled to him to return immediately.  He turned and looked down on us from his vantage point and then suddenly to the shrew's absolute horror the dull witted buffoon decided to launch himself off the dune to the part of the path we were gingerly making our way down.  All I heard was the shrieking of a terrified infidel as the fat kelb landed right on top of us knocking the female infidel off her feet which resulted in us both rolling down the hill in a heap onto the beach.  Needless to say I was most diepleased by this and let them know by joining in the shrieking as we tumbled down the hill with the kelb in hot pursuit.  As we landed at the bottom all I could see was the gormless face of the kelb looking down at us wagging his stupid tail, the harpy by now was bright red and furious.  Needless to say that was the end of that little expedition and we went home with the kelb on an extremely short lead.  Even though I am very cross with him for knocking me over, I can't help but snigger that "Mr Perfect" is currently the one in trouble with the harpy this morning.  If I had not been so put off by the hideous weather, I might have joined forces with him on this one occasion.    He has certainly gained a tiny bit of kudos with me.

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